71 Readers
103 Writers
headspinningfromvagueness

Ironic Contradictions

I'm a long time reader - since way back when I was seven. That makes it over three quarters of my life that I will be a reader for. But it is worth it. When I'm not reading or wasting my time online on here or Goodreads I'll be off playing video games, studying teaching and messing around with friends and pop culture. Or reading some more.

On Changing Identity


Yesterday, after one of my best mate's 21st birthday parties, I had an interesting thought on arriving home. It so happened that this 21st party had a black tie theme, so of course I was dressed up in a new suit and with a black tie on. So what I reflected upon is how, in recent years, my sense of fashion and identity connected to that clothing has changed. 

I'm perfectly at home in neat casual (it is what I wear most of the time - save for days when the weather or sport forces me into shorts and a t-shirt or singlet) but I do enjoy the rare chance to dress up a touch. I must say it helps when everyone else takes the opportunity to dress up with their dapper suits and beautiful dresses also. It's one of those things that five years ago I never would have thought would be something I would like and yet now do. Then again baseball caps and all manner of other things like facial hair and fringes are things I would never think to enjoy either.

The point of this all is how it reflects upon my changing identity. Five years ago I was far more of an introvert than I am now. I've always been an introverted extrovert and I've always known this. However in the past due to certain episodes and a general sense of awkwardness about myself (I used to be a very chubby child) I was more introverted. And it is in the more recent years that I have come to feel comfortable in who I am as a man and a human being. You could say I have a greater sense of identity and individuality as a student teacher and responsible young adult - free of the pressures to need to drink myself into oblivion or drive recklessly or do all manner of crazy things to impress young women (not that I haven't done crazy things...). I suppose a part of this lies in learning to understand a sense of conviction and I believe I have a greater sense of moral conviction as to how my life stands as a Christian. Because without that conviction as to how I should live I would, I believe, be more lead into compromising situations...

Today is Australia day, and in connection to this I wish to state that as part of my identity I proudly claim to be a part of a national identity built upon what I see as a strength of multiculturalism. Like every nation there are plenty of ugly sides to my country and while few of us are very 'patriotic', I doubt I could live in another land. It is unfortunate to see that many people try to dismiss Australia Day as 'invasion day'. And while I understand the reasons why and the emotions connected to such a thing another part of me reflects upon the idea that while it is important to be connected to the past, one cannot push on forward into the future if one is stuck in the past. I see those who consider Australia Day as invasion day as generally being more stuck in the past and wish that we could see more reconciliation and appreciation of what Australia is as a nation now on this day, rather than rue our disastrous history. It seems another interesting contradiction to me (one of many that we make) to speak in our modern society of moving forward while still being stuck on several key issues and I hope such issues can come to be resolved with conviction and clarity. Or else they will plague our identity as a nation moving onward, rather than leading to an identity which fits the wearer...