I am always fascinated by those who say things like 'it's my life I do what I want.' Or 'it's my body, my choice' etc. The second one interests me, but not in the whole way that people normally use it to defy rape culture or talk about abortion. It interests me more when it's used in a broader context, as part of a global idea that we truly have control over our lives. I'm not talking about fate or such but as a Christian I do believe that some things are meant to happen in a way.
Either way my little reflection now is on the question: do we really have control over our lives? Are our bodies really our own? Put it aside from any ethical idea - this is more philosophical. And my argument is no, our bodies really aren't our own. It's a Christian idea of course but it's one I believe can be validated somewhat rationally. I would argue my point along these lines:
Question 1: Did you choose to be born?
Question 2: Did you choose to be born into the country you were?
Question 3: Did you choose your family?
Question 4: Did your parents even choose you?
Question 5: Did you choose to be born into the body you are?
For myself I can say that the answer to all those questions is no. And I believe most people would agree. We don't choose the hour of our birth, we don't choose our family (most of the time) and we don't choose how our bodies are born. If we could choose, then most of us would be walking around as the sexiest, hottest individuals on the planet. So here is my argument: it's not my body, it's not really my life to do with fully as I choose. At least in the sense of me choosing the circumstances that brought me into reality.
However, it is my body and life in terms of having a life which I need to make choices for: what haircut do I get, what clothes do I wear, what job do I choose, who do I choose to romantically get tangled up with, what do I choose to read or watch or listen to: essentially what path do I choose to follow with all the options before me?
To quote Gandalf "all we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us." So essentially my point boils down to this: we have more of a custodianship of our lives than anything else and the claims of 'control' over our own lives seem to be vapid and empty. The point to me is to make the right decisions for your life and let things unfold from there. Bumps and tears will come no matter what, you can't really decide if one of your friends abandon you when you need it most or if someone close to you dies, but you can choose how you respond to anything in life.
Control: we don't really have it. But we do have choices to make as to how we respond to everything that happens.